Tips for Enhancing Recovery

April 27, 2012

In the addictive culture in which we live, it is difficult to get and keep the balance we need to stay focused on our recovery. I want to offer some tips in the next few blogs to assist in doing this. When we first find out we have a compulsive behavior that we can’t stop or that we are partnered with someone who has a sex addiction, life seems absolutely overwhelming, to say the least. It is as if you are looking out from within yourself at the whole world going by and no one understands the hell you are experiencing. It helps to have a checklist of activities to do and those to avoid. Later, I will cover details of each one. But, for now, here goes:

  • Have a regular routine every day–from the time you get up and go to bed, to the times you eat. Sometimes this is hard to do, with work and family schedules, but try to do the best you can.
  • Go to 12 step meetings and/or attend support groups.
  • Make phone calls. (Yes, I know all the excuses, but do it anyway)
  • WRITE a doable to-do list.
  • Include in your list a time for yourself to pray/read inspirational literature/meditate/journal/BE, even if for only 15 minutes.
  • Make a gratitude list daily. Studies have shown this strengthens the body’s immune system!
  • If you feel overwhelmed or simply unable to function, call a qualified therapist who specializes in sex addiction or complex PTSD. Never be afraid to ask for help. You are worth it.
  • Know that this feeling will not last forever–yes, the nightmare WILL be over.
  • Avoid reading or watching the news, especially just before bed, as this is the time for your body to repair itself.
  • Make yourself practice self-care: eating nutritiously, regular exercise, doctor appointments.
  • Avoid negative people and confrontations–learn to have a loving relationship with Self.
  • Walk through the fear.
  • If you slip or are tempted, use your recovery tools and forgive yourself.

In weeks to come, I will comment on each of these points in more detail. Please feel free to email or call me with questions or comments.